Past Perfect
by SFGrl
Summary: Choices in the past change the realities of the future. {complete}
1. His Future

Past Perfect, Chapter One  
"His Future"  
  
~Present Day~  
  
The morning sun shone through the thin curtains that lined his bedroom windows, warming up the room, and casting a yellow glow onto his bed. As the rapidly moving sun hit his face, he stirred, and let out a low groan, before pulling the tattered blanket over his head. Soon afterward, his alarm clock let out a tremendous blare, and he reached his arm out from under the blanket just far enough to hit the snooze bar. "Ten more minutes," he told himself.  
  
Forty-five minutes later, he reluctantly pulled his aching body out of his bed, knowing that he had to get at least something done before going in to work. He made his way into the bathroom, and flipped on the obnoxious florescent light. It blinked for a few minutes, before finally kicking on for good. The light let off an irritating buzz, but he hardly noticed. He stared at his reflection in the mirror. His eyes were still bloodshot, and he was about three days worth of stubble growing on his face. He turned on the water, and the faucet sputtered, before letting out a cool stream of water. He cupped his hands under the rusty faucet and splashed cold water on his face and neck. He laid his hands down on the sink, and leaned on his arms heavily. He let the water drip from his face for a minute, before looking back up into the mirror. It was going to be a long day.  
  
By the time he returned to the apartment a few hours later, he was exhausted again. He wasn't sure why he was so tired, other than the fact that he never got home before 4am. But he'd grown accustomed to the noctural lifestyle, and only recently had it caught up with him. He quickly changed his shirt and shoes, and headed to the bar.  
  
Schaffer's, a pub-style bar in the heart of the meat-packing district, was already hopping by the time he got there. The regular's had staken their claims at the ends of the bar, while a group of college kids had taken over the back corner. He shook his head as he yanked open the latch to the bar, and made his way behind it. It was gonna be another raucous night.  
  
***  
  
The alarm blared, but this time, he chose to ignore it. he turned it off and rolled over. "Screw it, I'm sleeping in," he said carelessly. A loud knock on the door took care of that promise. He groaned and got out of bed, making his way to the door. "Who is it?" he yelled.  
  
"Social Services," came the reply. He stood in front of the door, totally confused. Social Services? What the hell did they want? They obviously had the wrong apartment. He opened the door, and looked at the pale, bald, middle-aged man in the bad polyester suit warily.  
  
"Chandler M. Bing?" asked the man.  
  
"Yeah."  
  
"Joe Biech, New York Social Services. Do you know a Kathy Layton?"  
  
"I uh, used to," Chandler said, his heart lurching at the sound of his ex-girlfriend's name.  
  
"I am afraid I have some bad news for you. Ms. Layton has passed away. She died of a brain hemmorage about two weeks ago."  
  
"Oh my God. That's...awful," Chandler shook his head. Although he hadn't seen or heard from Kathy in almost three years, he still missed her terribly.  
  
"There's more," Joe said sternly.  
  
"What?"  
  
"Kathy had a three year old daughter, Lucy. You are listed on the birth certificate as the father."  
  
"What?"  
  
"Your daughter is currently staying in a foster home. It took us a while to find you, but now that we have, we are required to inform you that...well, that you are a father. I can see by the look on your face you did not know about this?"  
  
"No...I, uh, had no idea."  
  
"You will need to go to this address tomorrow to pick her up. They are expecting you around noon," Joe handed Chandler a small card with an address listed on it. "And you will need to come by my office to take care of a few legalities. Good day, Mr. Bing." With that, Joe left a stunned Chandler standing in the doorway, in total shock.  
  
***  
  
Chandler walked up to the large house, and felt his palms sweating. He wiped them on his pants, and straightened his tie. Why would this girl want to leave this giant house, and move to his tiny, stuffy studio apartment? He fidgeted nervously with the address card he'd been given, as he approached the porch. He shuffled up the steps, one-by-one, feeling his heart beat faster with every step. He wondered how this little girl was going to react to him. He wondered if she was going to hate him, and he wondered how in the hell he was going to care for her, when he could barely take care of himself. Before he had a chance to gather his thoughts, the front door flew open, and two eight-year old boys came flying out, running past Chandler as they tumbled to the lawn.  
  
"Sorry 'bout that," a heavy-set woman appeared in the doorway while Chandler was turned toward the boys.  
  
"Oh, uh, that's okay," Chandler said, smiling nervously.  
  
"You must be Chandler Bing. Joe said that you had quite a shock yesterday. I'm Marilyn."  
  
"Hi," Chandler shook Marilyn's hand.  
  
"Come on in, I'll get Lucy for you," Marilyn said, and ushered Chandler into the house. Before she closed the door, she called out to the two boys. "You two stay out of the street, and be back inside and washed up in thirty for supper." Marilyn turned and smiled warmly at Chandler, before disappearing into the next room to fetch his daughter.  
  
His daughter. Chandler couldn't believe that he had a daughter. He was so nervous, he felt like throwing up. He sat down on the edge of the sofa, but stood up again, when he realized that he was too nervous to sit still. He wrung his hands, and paced the room. A few minutes later, Marilyn re-emerged with the most beautiful child Chandler had ever seen. Her blue eyes sparkled, and her auburn hair lay in soft curls at her tiny shoulders. She looked at Chandler with an innocence and wonderment that made his heart break.  
  
"Lucy, this is Chandler," Marilyn said softly, pointing to the nervous father.  
  
"Hi," she said, her voice small and soft.  
  
Chandler stood rooted to the floor, not sure how to act around such a small child. He remembered being around Ben a bit, but never alone, and never for a long period of time. Chandler finally swallowed hard, and approached the little girl, crouching down to meet her face-to-face.  
  
"Hi, Lucy, it's nice to meet you," he said softly.  
  
"I'll go gather her things," Marilyn whispered, and slipped out of the room. Chandler looked up at her retreating figure, a mixture of panic and fear on his face.  
  
"Are you my daddy?" the three-year old asked quietly.  
  
Chandler looked back down at Lucy, his eyes glistening with tears. "Yes, I am," he finally choked out.  
  
Lucy smiled, and wrapped her arms around Chandler's neck. Chandler smiled, and hugged her back.  
  
"Pick me up, daddy," Lucy said happily.  
  
Chandler smiled and obliged. Then, Marilyn emerged with two bags and a large teddy bear. it was then that it hit Chandler. Lucy was going to be with him--forever.  
  
****  
  
I know what you are thinking (aw, man, another fic? why doesn't she just get a new hobby? LOL) and I promise the other Friends will show up...eventually. Please review! 


	2. Fatherhood

AN: Apologies to Ashley, who can't stand Kathy...but I did kill her off, so, ya know...;-)  
  
Past Perfect, Chapter Two  
"Fatherhood"  
  
  
"Do you want...pizza?" Chandler had been trying to guess what his daughter wanted for dinner for the past twenty minutes. He was starting to run out of food...so he started repeating some requests.  
  
"Uh-uh," Lucy shook her head.  
  
Chandler sighed. It was his second full day with his new daughter. He had taken a couple of days off of work, but he knew that he needed to make some decisions. There was no way he could keep bartending--not that he ever wanted to in the first place. Working at the bar was supposed to have been a temporary gig, until he could get something more...well, more like the job he had before he moved to California. Chandler wished he had never made the move out there. It was his way of trying to fix a relationship that was already starting to break down.  
  
~Four Years Earlier~  
  
"California? How-uh, how long are you going to be gone?" Chandler looked at his girlfriend quizzically.  
  
"Um, well, that's the thing, Chandler. I want to move out there-permanantly," Kathy replied.  
  
"Oh."  
  
"Look, you don't have to come with me. I'm not asking you to. I know how much you love New York."  
  
"Yeah. But, well, I mean, I love you, and well, it's not like I have any ties here anymore," Chandler looked down sadly.  
  
"Yeah," Kathy nodded, knowing that, even after two years, it was hard for him.  
  
"What the hell? I hate my job anyway," Chandler smiled.  
  
~Present Day~  
  
"Daddy?" Lucy cocked her little head to one side, and put her hands on her hips.  
  
"Huh?"  
  
"What you finkin' about?"  
  
"Oh Luc, I was, uh, I was thinking about your mommy," Chandler picked the little girl up.  
  
"Did you wuv my mommy?"  
  
"Yes I did," Chandler said softly, "I loved your mommy very much."  
  
"Why did you go away?"  
  
Chandler swallowed, unsure about what Kathy had told their daughter. Unsure about how he should reply.  
  
"Well, your mommy and me wanted different things, and uh, well, sometimes, grown-ups have to live apart for a while, so that they can understand one another, ya know?"  
  
"Huh?"  
  
"Yeah, no, it's okay, I don't get it either," Chandler muttered.  
  
***  
  
"Daddy, will you tell me a stowy?" Chandler had finally gotten Lucy to eat some soup, and was now tucking her into his murphy bed.  
  
"Um, okay," Chandler knew he didn't have any books in his apartment--at least none that Lucy would be into. He thought for a minute, and decided that he could make one up--after all, he was a writer, right?  
  
"Okay, well, once upon a time, there was a beautiful Princess, and she lived in a magical city called, uh, Gotham. And one night she met a handsome Prince. The Prince fell in love with her immediately, but he couldn't ask her out because his best friend, the Knight, was already dating her. But one night, the Prince kissed the Princess, and they knew that they were meant to be together. So they moved to another wonderful city, a city of Angels, where the sun was always shining, and the people were always happy," Chandler watched as Lucy drifted off to sleep. "And they lived happily ever after," Chandler whispered sadly. He looked around his tiny apartment, and wished that his life was more of a fairy tale.  
  
***  
  
Chandler watched the phone intently the next day, knowing that his agent was due to call at any minute. Jonathan Webster was a slick talent agent who had met Chandler at the bar, and had taken on Chandler's novel as a favour. Today was the day that Jonathan was supposed to be hearing from the editors at Random House (AN: I was going to blatantly promote the publishing company I work for, John Wiley & Sons, but then I thought that wouldn't be right--LOL) this afternoon, and this was the make-or-break deal for Chandler. He needed this book deal, now, more than ever.  
  
"Daddy, can we go to da pawk?" Lucy tugged on Chandler's sleeve.  
  
"Uh, in a minute, honey," Chandler said, mildly distracted.  
  
Lucy pouted and sat down heavily on the floor. Chandler turned and looked at her sour face, and his heart melted. God, he was *never* gonna be able to say no to her. He sighed, and decided that his machine could answer the phone just as effectively.   
  
"Okay, let's go!" Chandler said merrily. Lucy squealed and jumped into his arms.  
  
***  
  
Three hours later, Lucy and Chandler re-entered the apartment, exhausted, and covered in chocolate ice cream.  
  
"Okay, sticky girl, time for a bath," Chandler said.  
  
"Nooooooo!" Lucy protested loudly.  
  
"Yeeeeeesssss!" Chandler countered, and carried a kicking and screaming Lucy into the bathroom.  
  
Chandler had just tucked Lucy into bed when he saw the light on his answering machine blinking. The book! He had totally forgotten! He hit the play button, and sat on the edge of his seat-literally.  
  
"Chandler, it's Jonathan, gimme a call on my cell as soon as you get this--I have news."  
  
Chandler jumped from his chair and hit the speed dial. Sadly, Jonathan was the only person on Chandler's speed dial these days. His mother had died in a freak boating accident a year ago-and he was still estranged from his father.   
  
"Jonathan, it's Chandler."  
  
"It's about time, Bing!"  
  
"Yeah, sorry, sorry. Please, just tell me Random House liked the manuscript."  
  
"Random House didn't like the manuscript Chandler--the freaking LOVED it!"  
  
"Are you serious?"  
  
"As a heart attack. You've got to meet with them next Friday."  
  
"I can't believe this!"  
  
"Well believe it baybee!" Jonathan yelled.  
  
Chandler's hung up the phone and hopped onto the bed.  
  
"Luc, wake up, baby," he said excitedly.  
  
"Huh?" The sleepy child rubbed her eyes and sat up, looking at ehr father like he was crazy.  
  
"Daddy just got a book deal!"  
  
"Okay," Lucy said sleepily, and plopped back down onto her pillow.  
  
***  
  
~Friday morning-3am~  
  
"Shhh, it's okay," Chandler was walking in circles around the room, but no matter what he did, Lucy wouldn't stop crying. Of all the nights! Chandler had his big meeting this afternoon.  
  
"C'mon, Luc, what's wrong?" He placed his hand on her forehead. She was warm. He pulled his sweats on and wrapped Lucy in a blanket, and headed for the Emergency Room.  
  
***  
  
"Okay, what's the point of *having* and Emergency Room if you can't help her now?" Chandler yelled over the still-crying child.  
  
"Sir, we are dealing with a very full room right now, please just have a seat," the snotty attendant said.  
  
"I have BEEN waiting for two hours!"  
  
"I'm sorry, there's nothing I can do!"  
  
Chandler rolled his eyes, and left the ER, and headed to the only other place he could think of.  
  
*** 


	3. The Homecoming

Past Perfect, Chapter Three  
"The Homecoming"  
  
It wasn't until Chandler pounded on the door that he realized it was only 5:30 in the morning. He could only hope that no one had moved away. He heard a shuffling in the apartment, then Lucy started wailing again.  
  
"Shh, baby, it's okay," he whispered, as he saw a light flick on from the space between the door and the floor. He heard someone approach the door, and began to wonder if he'd made the right decision after all.  
Before he had a chance to change his mind, the door opened.  
  
"Chandler? Oh, my...God!"  
  
"Hi, uh, I uh...I know we haven't talked in a long time, but...uh, I need some help," Chandler pleaded.  
  
"Of course! Come in...what happened, who is the little girl?" Monica closed the door behind Chandler.  
  
"It's my daughter. Mon, I don't know what's wrong with her. She's been crying for hours...and I think she has a temperature--"  
  
"Okay, it's okay Chandler, calm down. Let me take a look," Monica took the crying child from her father, and layed her on the sofa gingerly.  
  
"What the hell is all that noise?" Rachel came flying out of her room, not fully awake, and not happy.  
  
"Sorry, Rach, my fault," Chandler held up his hand guiltily.  
  
"Oh, my God, Chandler?" Rachel blinked furiously, making sure her eyes weren't deceiving her.  
  
"Hi," Chandler said nervously, then turned back to Monica and Lucy, "Is she okay?"  
  
"Her temperature is pretty high," Monica said, looking at her thermometer, "Let me get a cool washcloth."  
  
"Is that your daughter?" Rachel asked, appraoching the couch as Monica went into the bathroom.  
  
"Yeah," Chandler grinned.  
  
"Wow, she's so beautiful," Rachel smiled. Monica returned with a damp washcloth and a blanket.  
  
"Thank you so much, Mon. I just...I didn't know what to do."  
  
"It's okay. She's never been sick before?"  
  
"Well...I've only actually known about her for a week, so I guess...I'm kinda new at the whole parent thing."  
  
"Oh," Monica said, not entirely sure she should pry into Chandler's personal life. It wasn't really her business anymore.  
  
Was it?  
  
"A week? Where has she been?" Rachel, apparently, had no trouble prying.  
  
"Kathy never told me we had a daughter," Chandler said quietly.  
  
"What happened?" Rachel asked.  
  
"Long story," Chandler shook his head, obviously in no mood to talk about it.  
  
"But--"  
  
"Rach, can you get some juice?" Monica interrupted her gossipy friend, and received a grateful glance from Chandler.  
  
"Oh, yeah, yeah," Rachel walked into the kitchen, shaking her head. She couldn't believe Chandler was back.  
  
***  
  
"Chandler?" Monica tapped Chandler on the shoulder gently.  
  
Chandler opened his eyes, and seemed disoriented for a minute. He looked up at Monica, and the events of the night came back to him.  
  
"What time is it?" He yawned.  
  
"Almost ten. I'm sorry to wake you, but, well, Ross, Phoebe and Joey will probably be here for breakfast soon, and--"  
  
"Yeah, I should probably go," Chandler finished.  
  
"No! No, that's not what I meant. I just thought maybe you should be awake, that's all."  
  
"Where's Lucy?"  
  
"Sleeping in my bed," Monica said.  
  
"I'm gonna go check on her," Chandler said, and shuffled into Monica's bedroom.  
  
Monica smiled, and started breakfast. Rachel emerged from her room ten minutes later.  
  
"Hey Mon, I had the weirdest dream last night!"  
  
"Wait, let me guess, yu woke up and found Chandler here with his daughter," Monica mused.  
  
"Wow! Did you have the same dream?"  
  
Monica laughed and shook her head. "He's in my room, checking on Lucy," Monica sighed.  
  
Rachel cocked her head to the side for a second, then realized what Monica was saying. So, it wasn't a dream.  
  
Before Rachel could say anything, Chandler reappeared, and greeted Rachel as he took a seat at the table.  
  
"Mon, I know that I already asked you a huge favour, and uh, I hate to ask another but..."  
  
"Yes, you can have some breakfast," Monica laughed.  
  
"No, it's not that...I mean, thank you, for the offer, but uh...I kinda have this really important interview today--"  
  
"You want me to watch Lucy for you?" Monica asked.  
  
"If it's a problem, I'll try to reschedule..."  
  
"It's not a problem...but you have to do something first," Monica said.  
  
"Anything."  
  
"Tell us what the interview is!"  
  
"Oh," Chandler laughed, relieved. "It's uh, with Random House Publishers," he said.  
  
"Is it for a job?" Rachel asked.  
  
"No, uh, not exactly. I wrote a book, and they want to publish it."  
  
"Wow! Oh, Chandler, that's so great!" Monica beamed.  
  
"Congratulations!" Rachel added.  
  
"Thanks, guys."  
  
Chandler's smile faded when he heard the door across the hall slam. He knew that he'd have to face this sooner or later. He swallowed, and waited for the other door to open. Monica and Rachel shared a look, as Joey walked into the apartment.  
  
"Mon, what's for break--" Joey froze. Chandler was the last person he expected to see sitting at the table.  
  
"Ch-Chandler," Joey said, his mood darkening.  
  
"Hey, Joe," Chandler said quietly.  
  
"What, uh, what are you doing here?"  
  
"It's a long story," Chandler said, looking at his hands.  
  
Before Joey could reply, Ross and Phoebe walked into the apartment, and both paled when they saw the tense scene they'd walked in on.  
  
"Chandler?" Ross said quietly, as Phoebe stood next to him with her mouth open.  
  
"Chandler was just about to tell us why he decided to reappear after six years," Joey said icily.  
  
Chandler opened his mouth to speak, but was interrupted.  
  
"Daddy?"   
  
Chandler looked toward the bedroom, then back at his shocked friends. He looked back toward the room, and stood up, just as Lucy walked out.  
  
"Hey, sweetie, are you okay?"  
  
"I'm thuwsty," Lucy said sleepily.  
  
"Okay," Chandler picked his daughter up, and turned back toward the kitchen.  
  
"Wow, uh, Chandler, I think introductions are in order," Phoebe said quietly.  
  
**** 


	4. Love, Friendship, & Destiny

Past Perfect, Chapter Four  
"Love, Friendship, Destiny"  
  
"Wow, uh, Chandler, I think introductions are in order," Phoebe said quietly.  
  
"This is my daughter, Lucy. Luc, this is Phoebe and Joey and Ross," Chandler said.  
  
"You-Your daughter," Joey whispered, still trying to recover from the shock.  
  
Chandler went to the refridgerator to get some juice for Lucy, while the rest of the group took their places around the kitchen table. They all watched Chandler in silence for a minute, still in shock that he was back, and even more shocked he wasn't alone. Chandler turned and noticed this a minute later.  
  
"I know I have a lot of explaining to do," Chandler sighed.  
  
"Sh, ya think?" Phoebe said.  
  
"Lucy, you wanna watch some cartoons?" Chandler asked, carrying his daughter to the couch. After situating her, he approached his friends again, and tried to look at his old friends.  
  
He couldn't.  
  
"I, uh, I guess I should start at the beginning, huh?"  
  
"Makes sense," Rachel shrugged. She had been eager to hear this story all night.  
  
"Okay. Uh, well, you all know what happened six years ago..."  
  
  
~Six Years Ago~  
  
"Look, I'm sorry! But there's nothing I can do, I think I'm in love with her!"  
  
"Who cares?! You went behind my back! I would never do that to you!"  
  
"You're right, I have no excuses! I was totally over the line."  
  
"Over the line?! You-you're-you're so far past the line, that you-you can't even see the line! The line is a dot to you!"  
  
"Yes. Yes! Right! And I feel horrible. You have to believe me!"  
  
"Is that why you bought all this stuff?! Well, y'know what I will not watch your TV, I will not listen to your stereo, and there's a cinnamon raisin loaf in the new bread maker that I'm not gonna eat! You know why?!"  
  
"Probably because…"  
  
"Because it's all tainted with your betrayal. From now on this apartment is empty for me! And I'm not happy about you either!"  
  
"Joey, please--"  
  
"No, ya know what, I can't even look at you right now!"  
  
***  
  
~Present Day~  
  
"Anyway, you know that Joey wanted to move out, and that I decided that I should be the one to move...so I ended up moving in with Kathy, until I could find a place. Well, I never really found a place, and before I knew it, two years had gone by, and I was still living with her. And then--"  
  
"So that's why we never heard from you?" Phoebe asked.  
  
"I knew I screwed up. And I knew I couldn't hang out with you guys without...tension. I never wanted to lose touch, it just...happened. And then I moved to California and--"  
  
"California?" Monica asked.  
  
"Kathy got a job out there. I quit my job, and went with her. We were miserable out there. Or rather, I was miserable. We broke up, and I moved back to New York a year later. Then, about a week ago, I get a knock on my door from Social Services. Turns out Kathy was pregnant when I moved, but she never told me. Then, about a month ago, Kathy collapsed and died...a brain hemmorage apparently. So, now I have a daughter," Chandler smiled as he said the last sentence, and looked toward the sofa.  
  
"Wow," Ross muttered.  
  
"So, uh, where do you live now?"  
  
"Across town. I'm gonna try to get a new place, now that I have Lucy. It's not a very good neighborhood, and--"  
  
"What about your book?" Monica asked.  
  
"Oh! What time is it? I should probably go...Uh, Mon--"  
  
"Of course I'll watch her--she'll be fine!"  
  
"Thank you...thank you so much," Chandler kissed Monica on the forehead then made his way over to Lucy to say goodbye.  
  
"What book?" Ross whispered.  
  
"He wrote a book, isn't that great?" Monica said happily.  
  
Ross shrugged. "I guess."  
  
Monica's smile faded slightly. Why couldn't they all put it behind them? Was she the only one that was thrilled to have Chandler back in their lives?  
  
***  
  
Chandler left the Random House offices three hours later. He was eccstatic--he was officially going to be a published writer! He looked at the check again--the advance would certainly help get him and Lucy out of that dump they were living in. He stopped into the bank to deposit his check, a content smile lighting up his face.  
  
His future was finally starting to take shape.  
  
*  
  
"Hey," Chandler greeted Monica as she opened the front door.  
  
"You don't have to knock," Monica smiled.  
  
"I, uh, I kind of feel like I should," Chandler smiled uncomfortably.  
  
"Oh, okay," Monica shut the door quietly.  
  
"Where is everyone?"  
  
"Uh, they had to do...stuff. They're coming back for dinner."  
  
Chandler nodded, "How was Luc?"  
  
"She was perfect. She's taking a nap now."  
  
"Okay."  
  
"So...how'd it go?"  
  
"Huh? Oh, it went great! They are publishing me, and they gave me my advance, which means I can officially quit the bar, and try to get a better place."  
  
"The bar?"  
  
"Yeah. I was, uh, bartending, up until Lucy came."  
  
"Oh."  
  
Chandler sighed and sat down on the sofa. Monica grabbed a couple of cups of coffee and joined him.  
  
"I never thought my life would turn out like this," he said quietly.  
  
"I know," Monica nodded.  
  
"You know, up until I found out about Lucy, I was completely regretting staying with Kathy. I mean, I sacrificed my life to be with her...and in the end...it just...I lost everything for nothing."  
  
"But now?"  
  
"It still saddens me to think that things will never be the same with you guys...particularly Joey. But at least I have Lucy now. It makes all the pain more worth it."  
  
"Joey never really got over your leaving. None of us did, but I think...deep down, he wants the same things you do. He wants your friendship back."  
  
"I hope so. I really want that. I've missed you guys so much."  
  
"We've missed you too," Monica smiled warmly. She was happy that he seemed intent on working things out with Joey, and sticking around. She really missed her best friend.  
  
More than she thought she would.  
  
*****  
  
This one is short, sorry bout that. But the next one will probably be mostly Chandler & Joey. No, not like that, get your heads outta the gutter. sheesh. I don't know if this will turn into a Chandler/Monica thing as yet...I really haven't thought that far. So if you have ideas and suggestions, now would be the time to throw them out.  
Thanks! 


	5. The Unforgiven, The Unforgivable

OMG, I totally forgot about this fic! Someone reviewed it the other day, though (Thank you!) and when I saw the review in my mailbox, I was like, "Whoa, I should probably finish this one." Yeah, yeah, I'm working on the other ones too, I promise.  
  
~*~  
  
Past Perfect, Chapter Five  
"The Unforgiven, The Unforgivable"  
  
Chandler stood in front of Joey's apartment door, shifting his weight from one foot to the other. To say he was nervous would've been an understatement. His friendship with Joey was the best friendship he'd ever had, and the fact that he had ruined it killed him inside. Raising a trembling hand, Chandler knocked lightly on the door, and swallowed hard. There was no going back.  
  
The door swung open, and Joey stood on the other side, an indecypherable look on his face. After debating for a minute, Joey motioned Chandler into the apartment, and shut the door behind him.  
  
"You want something to drink?" Joey asked quickly.  
  
"Uh, no, thanks, Joe. I, uh...I wanted to talk to you."  
  
"About what?"  
  
"About what happened to us. Look, I know I screwed up, and I know you hate me, but--"  
  
"I don't hate you."  
  
"What?"  
  
"I don't hate you, Chandler. I hate what you did. You were like a brother to me, and I am sad that you didn't see it that way."  
  
"But I did--"  
  
"No, Chandler, you didn't. If you had, you would have never done what you did. You have no idea."  
  
A thick, uncomfortable silence formed in the room, and each man dealt with the tension in their own way. Chandler shoved his hands deep into his pockets, and bit his lower lip, while he stared intently at his shoes. Joey sat down on his recliner heavily, and unconsciously played with the tattered seam that ran along the arm of the chair. Finally, Chandler stepped toward Joey, and broke the silent stand off.  
  
"From the day I kissed Kathy, there hasn't been a moment that has gone by that I haven't regretted my actions Joey. Especially after things fell apart with her. I never, ever believed that my relationship with her was worth losing you. But--" Chandler squatted next to the chair, so that he could look directly at his old friend.   
  
"That all changed the day I met Lucy. You have to understand, that I would do anything to take back everything that happened to you that day, Joey...anything except lose my daughter. I understand that you are hurt, and I understand that you don't trust me. But please don't tell me that I don't know how to love, because it only took me seconds to realize that Lucy is the best thing that has ever happened to me. And despite what you might think about my feelings toward Kathy, losing YOU was the worst thing that has ever happened to me. You are the only brother I've ever known, and that means you would be my daughter's favourite Uncle. The job's yours, if you want it."  
  
"It's not that easy, Chandler. You can't just walk back in here, and use your daughter to try to get me back in your life."  
  
"You're right, I know. Maybe I am selfish. Maybe I am a jerk. But I know that I can't just leave again. I want Lucy to know my family. You...all of you...you are my family."  
  
"Everything is too...Lucy looks so much like Kathy, and everytime I look at her, I'm...I'm just gonna know...I'm gonna remember what happened. And I...I don't think I'm ready to forgive you, Chandler."  
  
"That's fine. Take all the time you need, Joe. I'll wait. But Luc won't. She'll grow up, Joe, faster than you think."  
  
When Joey didn't reply, Chandler realized that he had ended the discussion. Sighing heavily, Chandler stood, and left the apartment quietly.  
  
Joey closed his eyes as the door closed. Everything Chandler had said was true. Joey wasn't sure how long he could be stubborn about this issue. He wanted Chandler back in his life, more than anything. Joey opened his eyes, and sighed, as fat tears fell down his face.  
  
***  
  
"He'll come around, Chandler," Monica said quietly. Chandler had filled Monica and Rachel in on the talk he'd had with Joey, and was now gathering up Lucy's things. He needed to get out of there.  
  
"I hope you're right, but honestly, I can't blame him. He has every right to be mad."  
  
"I think he stopped being angry a long time ago," Rachel observed.  
  
"Maybe," Chandler sighed. "I gotta go. Thanks again for everything, you guys," Chandler smiled, as he gathered up Lucy and headed for the front door.  
  
"Anytime!" Monica said.  
  
Chandler closed the door to Monica's apartment, and stopped in front of Joey's door. He raised his hand to knock, but thought the better of it. He needed to give Joey time, he knew that. He lowered his hand, and grabbed Lucy's hand, before heading down the stairs and out of the building.  
  
***  
  
The apartment wasn't much larger than his old one, but it was in a much safer area of the city. Chandler used most of his savings, and all of his advance, to secure his new home. While his book was in production, Chandler took a part time job at a small software company. He worked out an agreement with Monica, to help take care of Lucy. Monica was able to switch to a later shift, allowing her to pick up Lucy from pre-school at noon. Unbeknownst to Chandler, Joey would occasionally stop by to have lunch with Monica and Lucy. Joey had thought a lot about what Chandler had said to him, and, while he was not entirely ready to forgive Chandler, he couldn't help but to fall in love with Lucy.  
  
*  
  
It was a Thursday night, and Chandler had the following day off work. He sat on the subway, anxious to pick up Lucy from Monica's. He was looking forward to spending the entire day with his daughter, just the two of them. The subway lurched to a stop, and Chandler looked up, mentally counting the stops he had left. He smiled, remembering the first time he had taken Lucy on the subway with him.  
  
~~**~~  
  
"Daddy, it's a twain!!!" Lucy was jumping up and down, clapping wildly, as the trian pulled into the station.  
  
"Okay, Luc, let's get on!"  
  
"Daddy, I want to thit by the window!"  
  
"But Luc, you can't see anything out the window...it's dark!"  
  
"Daddy!"  
  
"Okay, okay," Chandler laughed.  
  
~~**~~  
  
"Bleeker Street, Bleeker Street station." The grainy announcement pulled Chandler from his reverie, as he stood to exit the train.  
  
Chandler bounded up the steps of Monica's building, mentally listing all of the things he wanted to do with Lucy the next day; The zoo, the park...he grinned and opened the door to Monica's apartment.  
  
*  
  
The scene inside the apartment epitomized chaos. Monica was on the house phone, Rachel was pacing nervously on the veranda, and Ross was on his cell phone. All three looked panicked and desperate.  
  
"Hey...what's going on?"  
  
Monica and Ross stopped dead in their tracks, and looked at Chandler, both paling considerably. It was then that Chandler began to panic himself.  
  
"Where's Lucy?"  
  
The look he received from Ross and Monica was devastating. Chandler was sure he felt his heart stop beating, in the split second it took Monica to whisper three words.  
  
"We're not sure."  
  
"Found her!" Joey came waltzing in a few seconds later, with a perfectly healthy and happy Lucy in his arms. "She was up stairs, playing with her doll. You're right, Mon, next time, I'm leaving the babysitting to you!" His proud smile faded when he saw Lucy's incensed father standing in the centre of the room.  
  
~*~ 


	6. The One With The Chick & The Duck

~Past Perfect, Chapter Six~  
"The One With The Chick & The Duck"  
  
(Where we left off)  
  
"Please tell me you're kidding," Chandler looked like he was going to pass out.  
  
"Uh, I just turned around and she was gone! She's quick, you know, for a girl and all..." Joey managed to stutter.  
  
But Chandler was in no mood to hear excuses. He rolled his eyes as Joey continued rambling, oblivious to the fact that his other friends were eyeing him nervously. They all figured that this was Chandler's big opportunity, his chance to get Joey to forgive him for the Kathy situation. But Chandler didn't seem all that interested in conversing with Joey, or anyone at the moment. He quickly gathered Lucy's things, and gathered Lucy from Joey.  
  
"You okay, Luc?" Chandler asked softly.  
  
Lucy nodded enthusiastically, and the others breathed another sigh of relief. The relief was short lived, however, when Chandler headed for the front door in silence, only to turn around in the doorway.  
  
"Say goodbye, honey," Chandler said to his daughter.  
  
"Gooooodbye!" Lucy giggled, as Chandler turned and walked wordlessly out the door.  
  
***  
  
Chandler was fuming, but had the sense to leave the apartment before he lost his temper completely. While he knew that he had every right to be angry at his friends for being so irresponsible, he was still harbouring a lot of guilt over what he'd done to Joey. And while the two weren't directly related, Chandler had enough sense to see that what had happened tonight was an accident, whereas what he had done was by choice.  
  
Still...how could they lose his daughter?  
  
More than anything, the event had scared him, and he needed time and distance to get over that. He held Lucy tightly in his arms, until they reached his apartment. Once inside, Chandler let Lucy down, and sunk down into the sofa. He sat stoically for several minutes. He was so deep in thought, it took him a few seconds to realize that Lucy was shaking his arm.  
  
"Daddy, whathz wong?"  
  
"Huh? What is it sweetheart?"  
  
"Whath wong? Why aw you cwying?"  
  
Chandler looked at Lucy quizzically, then realized that he had tears falling down his face. He quickly wiped them away, feeling slightly embarassed by his unusual display of emotion.  
  
"Nothing's wrong, honey, Daddy's just tired. And he is a little scared about what happened today, too."  
  
"What happened today?"  
  
"Honey, when Aunt Monica is watching you, she has to know where you are all the time, just like Daddy. It was scary when nobody could find you today."  
  
"Oh," Lucy seemed to be pondering Chandler's statement, but not for long. Suddenly, she perked up, and jumped onto Chandler's lap excitedly.  
  
"Daddy, can we go to Uncow Joey's again? I wike him."  
  
"Uh, yeah, sure honey." Chandler was taken aback. Was Joey spending a lot of time with Lucy? He pondered this, as Lucy began telling him all about her fun-filled day at Aunt Monica's.  
  
*****  
  
Joey paced nervously, as he waited for Chandler and Lucy to arrive. He'd recieved the call from Chandler earlier in the day, asking if he was free for a visit. It was difficult for Joey to gauge Chandler's mood over the phone. While he didn't seem overly upset, he didn't seem very friendly either. Joey had been on edge for the majority of the morning, and had consequently lost his appetite. He apartment door opened, and Joey nearly jumped out of his skin.  
  
"Joey, are you okay?" Monica walked in, carrying a plate of food.  
  
"Huh? Yeah, yeah, I'm fine," Joey said, unconvincingly.  
  
"You didn't come over for breakfast...we got worried."  
  
"Yeah, I, uh, I'm not hungry."  
  
Monica's brow furrowed, and she immediately crossed the room, and placed her hand on Joey's forehead. He pulled away, and sat down in his chair.  
  
"I'm okay, I'm just nervous. Chandler and Lucy are coming over."  
  
"Oh. What did he say? Is he mad?" No one had seen or heard from Chandler for two days. They were all beginning to wonder if they'd ever see him and Lucy again.  
  
"I couldn't tell. He was pretty calm. He just asked if I had some free time today."  
  
"Oh," Monica's shoulders dropped, deflated. She wondered why Chandler hadn't bothered to call anyone else.  
  
There was a sharp knock on the door, and both Monica and Joey jumped. Joey stood up and walked toward the door. He took a deep breath, and swung it open. Chandler stood on the other side, with a smiling Lucy in his arms.  
  
"Uncow Joey!!"  
  
"Uh, hey, Lucy, how are ya?"  
  
"Goood."  
  
"H-Hey Chandler."  
  
"Hey."  
  
"Come on in," Joey stepped back, and let Chandler and Joey enter.  
  
"Monica," Chandler said, obviously surprised by her presence.  
  
"Hi, Chandler...Hey Lucy!"  
  
"Hi Aunt Monica!"  
  
Chandler put Lucy down, and she immediately headed for Chandler's old bedroom. Chandler watched, and then looked up at Joey, confused.  
  
"Uh, she, uh...she likes the chick and the duck."  
  
"The chick and the...are they still alive?"  
  
"Yeah," Joey laughed nervously.  
  
Chandler cocked his head to one side, then followed Lucy into the bedroom. Joey and Monica followed closely behind.  
They watched Lucy quietly for a minute, as she chased the nervous birds around the room. Chandler bit his lip, and silently urged the others to walk back into the living room.  
  
"I, uh, I'm glad Luc is distracted for a minute, because I wanted to talk to both of you...well, all of you, but I can find the others later," Chandler perched himself up onto a barstool, and looked over at Joey and Monica.  
  
"I'm not mad at you guys, really I'm not. I guess...I guess the whole thing just, um, freaked me out, and, to be honest, I didn't want to do, or say something that would make you mad at me again...I know that things are still...you know--"  
  
"Wait," Joey interrupted, "You thought I'd be mad at *you*?"  
  
"Well, I thought you were still mad at me, and..."  
  
"Chandler, the two things aren't even related to each other."  
  
"Yes, yes they are. They both involve our friendship, Joey, and they-they both have to do with trust...being able to trust each other, being able to trust the people you love. Your friends. Your family. I have to work to earn your trust back, I know that, and I--I just didn't want you to think that I'd lost any trust in you...I--I didn't know how to explain it. I still don't, I guess," Chandler laughed nervously.  
  
"I think you did a pretty good job," Monica smiled.  
  
"Okay, look, Chandler. Losing your daughter, even for the like, 20 minutes, is about a million times worse than you kissing someone I knew I didn't have much of a future with. You are right--trust needs to be earned--but," Joey approached Chandler, and grinned, "I'm sick of being angry. And--" Joey looked back at Monica, then leaned over toward Chandler and whispered, "Ross is too damned annoying to be my best friend."  
  
Chandler laughed audibly, and pulled Joey into a manly hug. The two friends pulled away when they heard Monica sniffling.  
  
"That was so sweet," she cried, as Chandler and Joey laughed.  
  
  
***~***  
  
"Okay Luc, blow out the candles!"  
  
Lucy took a deep breath, and blew as hard as she could, nearly knocking herself out in the process. But she was able to extinguish all four candles successfully, making her squeal with delight.  
  
"Can I open pwesents now, Daddy?"  
  
"Presents? What presents?"  
  
"Those pwesents!" Lucy pointed dramatically toward the living room, where a ridiculous number of gifts covered Monica's coffee table.  
  
"Those? Well, those are my presents!"  
  
"Nuh-uh!"  
  
"Nuh-huh!"  
  
"Okay, you two. I'm gonna cut the cake, if you all want to go into the living room to--well, you know," Monica glared at Chandler knowingly.  
  
"Alright, alright," Chandler smiled, and led Lucy to the living room.  
  
*  
  
Lucy tore into the box excitedly, and squealed happily as she produced two stuffed animals--toy replica's of Joey's chick and duck. "Thank you Uncow Joey!!"  
  
"Anytime, sweetheart," Joey grinned, as Chandler leaned in and whispered, "Thank you for getting the fake kind."  
  
"No problem," Joey laughed, hugging his friend tightly.  
  
~*~ 


End file.
